.:|:. Dove Love’s .:. Points and Passions .:|:.

By Dove, www.TarotwithLove.com  This post is actually about the number 5 :)  Geez, this number is haunting me!  Especially right in this moment, I keep seeing it EVERYWHERE, and I have been seeing it and the number 16 prolifically in the last several days.  The 16 (Tower card in the Tarot) is also a number I allow to rattle me – I allow both of these numbers, 5, 16 to spur fear in me.  And the thing is, the number five is very much a part of me.  Today’s the 23rd, which equals 5, and I was also born on the 23rd (one of my 5’s), my first and second given names have 5 letters.  The number 5 is very strong in my numerology…   and gawd knows, my life has certainly reflected the 5 energy. 

The most potent thing that the 5 represents is change — and per the Tarot, change that isn’t very comfortable, but I think most significant changes generally aren’t.  I s’pose because I’ve experienced so much of the negative side of the 5, it’s difficult for me to see the good in it.  But there is good (”God”) in it, just like there’s good in everything.  The big “God” is everything, both the “Devil” and the good side of All That Is, ”God,” :)  Consequently “God” encompasses both sides of the coin.  Everything has both “good/positive” and “bad/negative” energy (”God”) in it.  Everything.  No matter how generally good (Star/Sun) a Tarot card is, there is still a negative to it…and no matter how negative a certain card generally is (Devil) there is still a positive side to it.  Numbers, astrological signs, Tarot cards, people, gods, and goddesses :) — everything and everyone has the energy of both positive and negative within them.  Love is just the top side of the coin, with hate on the other side.  Same with peace and conflict.  One is simply meaningless without the other.  That seems like a no-brainer, but it’s difficult at times to remember.

I am passionate about freedom, and our basic human right to have freedom.  The 5 represents freedom.  Given that, you’d think I’d love the 5.  But again, it spooks me because I have such a habit of seeing it in the negative.  There’s not one generally “good” card in the Tarot with a 5 on it.  The 5 of cups almost always represents sadness, loss, maybe having been abandoned by a loved one.  The 5 of swords (almost always) represents wicked conflict, sometimes hatred and war, self-interest in a bad way…  The 5 of coins…loss, fear, insecurity, poverty, ill-health…  The 5 of wands is usually another conflict card, with less venom than the swords card.  And even the 5th major arcana (most significant cards in the Tarot) represents something I, for the most part, deplore — religion and tradition.  The Hierophant, pope — ultimately, the teacher.  Something I’ve been called, and oddly, deplored the idea of as a child (I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I would say, ”I just know it isn’t a teacher!” lol)  The Hierophant often represents rigidity, something or someone that (come hell or highwater) is not going to change.  If I get this card in a future spot, it often means nothing’s happening, nothing’s going to change any time soon.  A “no change” message. 

So where do the cats, dogs, popcorn and foxes come in? lol  Well, in hesitating to write this post, I momentarily left the computer, plopped down in a chair, and clicked on the remote.  And there was my most unfavorite thing on TV, a football game.  Blecky, with a capital “B” ;)  A referee was on the ground for some reason, showing me the number “5″ on his back.  Geez.  Then a swoosh of …  number 18 on a players back, and then I heard the announcer say several words that seemed like gibberish to me, something about “Cats chasing dogs…popcorn…and foxes.”  I dunno.  But it all has meaning, if I would take the time with it…  The 18, I know — it’s the Moon card.  Fear.  Probably reflecting my fear of the 5.  I had just drawn cards asking about this 5 message that the Universe is drowning me in and pulled three major arcana cards, the first was the Magician (the fox is on this one in the Animal-Wise Tarot), then the Temperance card, and then the Empress.  All generally very positive and powerful cards.  A significant time in my life.  A need to bring more balance into my life, a seemingly unending need.  Healing…a need to process “stuff,” my emotions are just all over the place.  It’s like old stuff is coming up and I don’t know what to do with it, it’s overwhelming…  As always, I resist expressing myself, expressing what’s been gnawing on my insides all my life.  Reeking havoc in my life, making it impossible to have genuine, long-lasting relationships with others…and just drawing other angry ones like myself, who experience similar patterns.  Some who hide it better than I with all their syrupy talk with no foundation, others who don’t hide it at all and seem to hate everyone…  And those like me, who seem to vacillate between the two ;) forever seeking that balance and authenticity.

I know like attracts like.  I don’t believe in the “projection” theory :)  Well, I do, sort of, but I think if we have an ongoing connection with someone, there’s a potently similar energy there.  What’s intrigued me are the people I draw to me.  Oh, they all carry anger, no doubt about that — no projection there :)  I think most people carry it, just varying degrees…  But it’s interesting to observe how they each mask their anger.  Some don’t — some are clearly explosive with their anger.  Others claim they aren’t angry, all the while masking it with that passive-aggressive thing or similar.  I think those who recognize that they are angry are at least closing in on the “cure.”  But those who are angry or are still angry despite all their “love talk” and meditation, now those people are more inclined to do the projecting.  One sweet guy I drew a while back, is kinda one of those people.  Very much a “love talk” kinda guy, resisting the anger per his religion’s teachings – he now has colon cancer.  That concerns me per what I discovered with talking to my emotions, and the discovery of my anger living in my stomach…and then becoming depression (”Jake”) in my colon… 

I think we have to go and confront our “5,” maybe live with the 5 for a while to work through it all…  It seems to be crucial so as to get the healing and peace that follows in the number 6.  The 6 of cups is peace…(or it can show a continuing to repeat the patterns of the past).  The 6 of swords, grieving, healing, moving on…  The 6 of coins, giving and receiving, we gotta learn to do both…  The 6 of wands — victory! :)  And the big kahuna, heh, 6th major arcana, the Lover’s card — real love, bay-be! ;)

Unfortunately, we can’t skip the 5 to get to the 6, no reaching the love and peace of the 6, without moving through the anger and hatred of the 5 first.  Many of us try to do this — like religious leaders who wind up on the floor in a fetal position, and priests who harm children in a most vile way…  If we try to sidestep the 5, push down our anger and pain, it will come out sooner or later in some wicked way, often as disease or ill-treatment of others.  See the 5 Tarot cards, they all kinda dance together — they are surely spun from our inability or resistance to change, like many of our leaders, the Hierophant in his/her worst light.  The Hierophant is the teacher, and most of our religious teachers have taught us from fear, because most of our religions are rooted in fear… and we’re paying the price of holding this energy (anger, all ”negative” emotion is rooted in fear), of learning and endeavoring to adhere to all these rigid rules. 

Freedom, a wonderfully positive side of the 5, is not, nor will it ever be about rigid rules.  And without freedom (no rigid rules or religion, negative face of the Hierophant), then there will be no genuine love, the blessed energy of the Lover’s card.

Hmm, well, it’s a little after five, maybe I should go make some popcorn, lighten up a bit ;)

Peace,
Dove

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